Sexual Sunday: Playboy Against Womens Bodies?

If your new round these parts then you mightn't know that Sunday is the day of rest and also a perfect excuse for sex or some sexy reading - or both, you lucky ducks! Sometimes I like to review sex toy shops and other times I just ramble on about anal or casual dating. Today its all about Playboy, enjoy!

Not so long ago headlines like 'Nudes are old news at Playboy' will have been plastered all over the place and it was hard to miss. One of the most iconic 'sexy' brands are going to be giving up what they are most well known for, nudity. Why you might ask, well because of the internet of course. There is nothing you can in a magazine that you can't get more of - and in more depth or extreme ways, then online. Playboy has seen a massive decrease in the amount of magazines its selling monthly and they are looking for ways to boost sales. Love it or hate it, Playboy has been around since 1953 with Marilyn Monroe on the very first cover, and it seems like its not going anywhere any time soon.

With the website being made safe for work since 2012 they have a seen a huge increase of traffic and hope that this will continue to happen, along with the magazine. Some of the other notable changes will include a sex positive female who will write the Mr Jones sex column and the target audience will be young employed men. Leaving aside the 'sex positive female' for a second, lets just focus on the lack of nudity. Or should I say, 'what about the tits!?' as a lot of people commenting on the articles and news stories discussing this.

Personally I don't really have a problem with Playboy as a magazine. Along with it publishing interviews with people such as Jimmy Carter, Malcolm X and Valdimir Nabokov, it was one of a kind when it began and its played some part in bringing women who have been on the pages since more fame. It was one of the first notable magazines to publish a cover with an African American woman on the cover (Darine Stern) which helped to shift peoples ideas of beauty. It had featured two other African American Playmates by the time, but Naked African Americans were only published in magazines produced for and targeted at the black community. I'm not suggesting that I have an entirely positive stance on it however as it does objectify women and if your to believe all the things that are said to have gone on in the Playboy Mansion, then it could be indeed a very negative and scary brand to be involved with and give your money to. 

Back to the 'sex positive female' who will now write the Mr Jones articles for a minute, Its sad that it must be stated the person who is writing will be positive about sex. I haven't ever seen the same statement made when men write for it. I'm not having a big feminist rant here, don't get me wrong, I'm just doing my regular rolling of the eyes at how crappy people still are.

I feel that it could all be a PR stunt to get people talking about Playboy again and have it on the map, So far they have certainly succeeded in getting the brand onto every paper, site and social media platform, even with the meme of 'I only read it for the articles'. Now that 'all' that will be left are the articles, I wonder how long it will be before we see models strip again for the cause. Playboy has said that while there will still be women posing and center folds, it will be tasteful and artful. The covers are said to echo this too, as studies done showed younger people to 'like art' as Cory Jones, who is chief content officer of the magazine, was quoted on. 

I might be majorly in the wrong for saying this, but when you take the sex appeal out of a well known sexy magazine, your not left with a lot. Those who have bought it for the purpose of seeing nudes will doubtfully now buy it for the editorial content and the artistic photography, when they can get what was denied to them for free online and in greater quantities. It will be really interesting to see how this develops and what Playboys annual figures are once nudity is taken away from March 2016. I know personally I'll get the last nudity copy and then the next issue, just to compare.

So, is it good or bad that nudity is soon gone from Playboy? I'd love to hear your thoughts!

Sexual Sunday: I Am Not A Unicorn

Over the past couple of months I have noticed a steady stream of traffic to my blog for my sex based posts. And although it is the most wonderful thing to see (thank you peoples!) it does sometimes mean that I get a few less then wholesome people, who think that just because they are online and therefore anon, they can say and do what they like without consequence (or so they think.) Some do genuinely think that all their birthdays have come at once when they find a girl who not only openly talks about sex, but also shows her face and puts her full name to the words. So this, lads and lassies, is not only going to be a post, but you will also see it labelled as 'Sex FAQs' at the very top of my blog, so I can easily direct those who feel obliged to drop me a few dirty lines.

Are you really real?

As you live and breathe. Honest to god, I couldn't be more real if I tried.

Are you the only sex blogger in Ireland?

As of writing this, I am not aware of anyone else like myself in Ireland. And there are no 'anon' sex bloggers in Ireland either. This is something that personally makes me a little upset. People need to start talking and blogging about sex more! Lets get the conversation going and quit the tight lipped, religious stereotype that Irish people still carry. However if you have a quick look, there are lots of sex bloggers in the rest of the world.

Are you straight and what is your (born with) gender?

I identify as bisexual and am a female.

Will you have sex with me?

No. As lovely as I'm sure the offer is, I wont be having sex with you.

But, you blog about sex on the internet! You must not really mean what you talk about.

Yes, I do  blog about sex on the internet. But that does not mean I am a free for all, to have you say and do the things you might want to. Please respect that I am a person who is not only known for writing about sex. I write about beauty 99.9% of the time, as I do have other interests too. I genuinely enjoy what I talk about and I love to get the conversation going, educate and maybe spark an interest in something new for those who read my posts.

You are clearly asking for it, you slut.

I'm not even asking to read my blog, nor do I insist or demand that you tweet/message/email me abuse. The base for everything I write about is consent and being safe. If you can't look past the 'dirty' stuff to be able to see that, then you might want to have a chat with yourself. Nor am I doing it to spite anyone who might be religious, as so many of you comment. People can get this sort of information all over the interwebs, I promise I'm not the only one 'polluting the minds of the young'.

I need your advice on XYZ.

I wholeheartedly love every single (nice) thing that is sent to me and I will try to make a point of responding to everyone. But I also work 9-5 and do lots of other things outside of blogging, so if it takes me a while to reply I do apologise. Other then that, the major thing I am always telling people is that I am in no way qualified to give advice. For some of you, I will suggest that you visit a GP or counselor. For the rest, I always suggest keeping the lines of communication open with your partner and having an open mind with everything you do. You only live once, don't be the one to restrict yourself!

You are so intriguing/I've never met a girl like you before/You are fascinating/Why did you start to talk about this stuff online, your a girl after all!

  Without sounding like a bitch, get in line with the rest of them. I hear that all day, everyday and I can promise you that you are wasting your time. Flirting and flattering will not get you into my bed. I am not a unicorn (although I now know how they must feel) I am just an average girl who likes to talk more about what the media and society feeds off of and throws at you every waking hour, whether or not you want it. There is nothing more satisfying then interviewing people, exploring new things and doing research for potential posts. Its totally different to beauty blogging or anything else in my life and I love it. The best part is that you can then choose to read it, or continue onto a beauty post instead. 

What will you do next?

Whatever happens to take my fancy I guess! I am always happy to take requests.

Do you work with PRs for your sex posts?

Yes indeed! I have done lots of posts in the past that have been sponsored or that I have been given things/services to review. All are marked with an * and more can be read about it in my disclaimer section. Anything that I am sent or service I'm asked to review, will always be 100% my own opinion and I will never give a 'good' review just because I didn't pay for it.  

You say a lot of dirty stuff /Only talk to guys on social media.

I say a lot of dirty stuff IRL too. The way I talk and act on social media is in no way different then if I was talking to my mother or someone in Tesco. Although I do have a serious side and can be professional when its called for, I don't see social media as a place to limit myself. I am who I am, sorry!

Yes, I do talk to a lot of guys on social media. Some are friends and then others are just passers by who might read my blog. I do however talk to way more female friends through texting, IRL and lot of Facebook group chats. People just don't see that. I have no preference for what gender I talk to, nor do I make am effort to only talk to men.

Have you slept with a lot of people? How many!

Yes. And its really none of your business until I decide to maybe tackle that in a future post.

I bet you have the best life, having sex and writing about it!
That might look like the case, but I don't actually write about having sex, or sex in a erotica way. When I write, theres normally hours of practical work, research and editing gone into a simple Sunday post. Not only that, but dealing with the abuse I get online can be hard. Also writing about personal things (like my 'I'd like to get married, please' post or my post on rape) can be draining and upsetting. However I write because I love it and if it was easy, everyone would do it! So think before you tell me I've the best of anything ;)

Do feel free to check back now and again on this post, I have a feeling I'll be adding to it when I get asked more questions in the future!

Sexual Sunday: I'd Like To Get Married, Please

After a hiatus of two weeks, it seems like its only right to start again with a Sunday post (yes, I'm aware this is technically posted on a Monday, but for some reason it didn't publish on Sunday. Feckin thing!) You know the drift by now, I'm a beauty blogger week days, but come the weekend I blog on Sundays about all things sex and sex related. So lets feed that need and talk about #SexualSunday things.

We are now officially into May, one more month until were at the half way point in the year. Normally May brings sun, showers, friends birthdays and the beginning of breaks for some students, but May 2015 is like no other. This May, the 22nd to be precise, Irish people are going to be voting on one of the most important decisions in many peoples lives; the right for everyone to get married. That means gay and lesbian people - the entire GLBT community can, if they wish, get married to their partner. I'm not here to beg or plead, I'm just here to let my feelings on the topic be heard. Under normal topics up for debate, I like to hear both sides. But when its a human rights and equality issue, an issue that not only effects me personally but the entire country, I don't tend to listen to the 'no' side that much. 

The simple question is, do we as a nation want everyone to be equal? Or do we want to continue to have those living in Ireland that are gay and lesbian to be seen as second class citizens. Personally, when I'm driving home from work and I see 30 or 40 'no' posters in succession, it makes me sad to think that people, who I might have even talked to on the phone earlier that day, tell me that I don't have the right to get married if I wish. Even people who I thought were my loved ones and friends are no longer as they will be voting no this May. I have studied youth work, volunteered with Scouting Ireland, volunteered in nursing homes and so much more. Am I less of a person because I am a bisexual woman who might love another woman? Are my efforts less valid and should your children, mothers, fathers, friends and others be taken out of my care because who I choose to love in my personal life is currently still seen as wrong to many?

Today thousands of children live with their parents who are same sex couples. None of them are less loved or cared for then those of opposite gender couples and parents. It enrages me to hear those on the 'no' side saying that the traditional family is the only type of family. I was raised by my mother, my father didn't have much input. So, as someone who was raised by a single parent I can say that it was still a family and I was very much loved (and I turned out alright, if you can overlook the sex blogging and that!). There is no such thing as a traditional family. No such thing.

And as my granny only said to me today (who is by the way, 86 and one of the greatest people you will ever have the pleasure of meeting) What harm is it doing anyone? People just want to get married and be as happy as the next couple. All this talk of keeping marriage a good pure thing, sure theres divorces every single day now. There are same sex couples together for decades, just not able to marry. Its not right.

I could go on about this for hours, but I wont. All I'll say is, come the 22nd of May, you have the power to choose if I and many others in Ireland get the chance to be married to someone they love. So please go out and vote, this is a potential life changing day for your friends, your family, your neighbours and those you might not even know yet.

Find out more at yesequality.ie.